Monday, June 19, 2006

Single Parenting

Written last week

My beloved hubby is out of town on business, so I am "single parenting" again! Having a child is hard, I couldn't imagine doing it on my own. It's tough doing this by myself. Right now I am EVERYTHING to my son. His source of entertainment, the one who feeds him, changes him, dresses him, teaches him, hugs him, kisses him, brushes his teeth, washes his hands, puts on his shoes, EVERYTHING! Not one thing that happens to him all day is not touched by me somehow. Sometimes it is overwhelming. When my husband goes out of town, I know it's going to be rough. I know what to expect- I know that by then end of each day that I will be so exhausted- mentally and physically that I will go to bed not long after Isaiah does, or that I will be so overtired that I won't be able to fall asleep for hours. I know that I will wake up the next day feeling like I didn't get any sleep at all.

I feel this way and I only have one child! I don't know how I would do it with two! But my friends who have more than one tell me, you just do it- you adjust. Still. I can't imagine!

This is not to say that I don't appreciate motherhood alone. I do, and I salute people out there who do it on their own, for years and years. You military mothers out there are truly amazing. My husband will only be gone for a week or two at most at a time, and here I am feeling melancholy! My mother did it with us for so many years. Talk about loving sacrifice! I know I have just been spoiled rotten by my husband being such an involved father! Times like these make me thank God for the wonderful man I married. Even though I am home most of the day with Isaiah, those few hours that Dave is here with us is such a relief to me- it's the happiest part of our day- when Daddy comes home! And now that time is just ordinary, like the rest of the day.

I know Isaiah misses his daddy like crazy. He starts to call "Da-yie" around the time Dave usually gets home- wondering where his papa is. He's always a happy little boy, and we have lots of laughs together all day long. But I know he misses his Daddy- especially in the evening when Dave usually gets home and they spend time just laughing and being silly together. I miss hearing the laughter they share together every evening when Daddy gets home- it's my favorite sound in the world- the most gleeful sound you will ever hear.

I try to fill in for "Da-yie" being absolutely silly, tickling, making faces... Isaiah laughs and of course he loves it. But I know it's just not the same.

We miss you "Da-yie" and we can't wait to see you!

NOTE: by the time this is posted, my husband will have returned and all will be right in "my lil world" again!

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