Friday, November 19, 2004

OH MY, I’M HUGE!

I feel very large today! Where did all this come from all of the sudden? I swear, I didn’t look this big yesterday. I feel like I am so much wider! And am I just walking slow… or could I be waddling? So today I chose to wear a red sweater, and I feel so much like Kool Aid walking down the hall! That’s nice. Yeah, and last night at our childbirth class, I felt like my belly was sticking out waaay further than any of the other preggers. Dave kept trying to reassure me that it’s all in my head. But still, I feel gihugic.

MOLLY SHANNON TEACHES MATERNITY

The teacher of our childbirth class looks and acts like Molly Shannon (from SNL and the movie Superstar). She is too funny! So we learned that 10 centimeters (you have to be dilated this much to start active labor) is the width of a small bagel or an English muffin! So next time you’re sitting down having breakfast… you just keep that in mind. A big ole baby has to pass through that leetle tiny hole.

Alright, I have a confession to make. I actually fell asleep for about a minute during the “relaxation exercises”. I was so tired, and what did you expect while the teacher has me lying on the floor with pillows, playing relaxing music? I woke up when the couple behind us farted. I guess they were trying so hard not to laugh (not sure what was so funny) but all of the sudden we heard someone fart! This was a genuine fart! I don’t know if it was momma to be or papa to be, but less than 30 seconds later, they had practically ran out the door! Good times, good times.

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